You've Been Putting Yourself Off All Summer

By: Jamie Gahagan, MACP

"I'll deal with it after vacation."

"Things will calm down once the kids are back in school."

"Summer is just so busy right now."

If you've caught yourself saying something like this over the past few months, you're not alone.

Every summer, life looks a little different. There are vacations to plan, kids home from school, backyard barbecues, long weekends, weddings, and all the things that make this season so enjoyable. It's easy to tell ourselves that we'll focus on our mental health once life settles down.

The problem is...life rarely settles down.

As a therapist, I often notice a shift when September and the cooler weather rolls around. My inbox gets busier. People who have been carrying anxiety, stress, relationship struggles, or burnout all summer finally reach out. It’s not because their struggles suddenly appeared, but usually because they've been putting themselves last for months.

And honestly? I get it (as a mom, I TOTALLY get it).

When you're trying to keep up with everyone else's schedules, your own needs can quietly move to the bottom of the list.

Waiting Isn’t Failing

There's no shame in realizing you've been putting yourself off.

Sometimes it's the only way you've known how to cope - Hello, survival.

You convince yourself that you'll have more energy next week, or that things will feel easier after your vacation. That once work slows down, you'll finally start taking care of yourself.

But every season seems to come with a new reason to wait.

What If You Didn't Need the "Perfect Time"?

One thing I talk about with many of my clients is the difference between waiting to feel ready and choosing to take a small step anyway.

You don't have to have everything figured out before you reach out for support.

You don't need to be in crisis.

You don't need a perfect explanation for why you're struggling.

You don't even need to know exactly what you want to work on.

Sometimes the bravest first step is simply saying, "I don't want to keep doing this alone."

A Different Way to Think About September

As September approaches, many of us start thinking about fresh starts. New routines, new goals, a chance to get back on track.

Instead of asking yourself, "How can I finally fix myself?" try asking:

"What have I been putting off because I've been too busy taking care of everything else?"

The answer might be so simple that it surprises you.

Maybe it's giving yourself permission to rest.

Maybe it's setting a boundary.

Maybe it's having a difficult conversation.

Or maybe it's finally reaching out to a therapist.

Whatever your answer is, it doesn't have to wait until everything else is done.

Because your well-being deserves a place on your to-do list, too!

Reflection

Take a moment to ask yourself:

What is one small thing I've been telling myself I'll do "later"?

Then ask yourself one more question:

What's one small step I could take this week instead?

Small steps often create the biggest changes. They won’t solve everything overnight, but they move us toward the life we want to live, and that is more than enough!